It’s Monday, and although I have all day to myself (a.k.a. I have four solid hours without kids at home), I am feeling rushed to get everything done that I have on my list for today. So, I’m just going to cut to the chase.

I have been struggling with Zackery lately, and his attitude of feeling entitled to everything, all the time. Initially I thought it was because he just had his birthday and was super excited about all his gifts (he got some REALLY cool Lego’s – thanks friends!). He was fighting with me every time I tried to get him to write his thank you notes. Usually I do it for him, but he’s six now and completely capable of doing it himself (with a little help from Mom or Dad). It got to the point where I wouldn’t let him play with one of his new Lego’s until he wrote the thank you for it (felt pretty smart about that one – although I’m sure I’m not the first Mom who thought of that tactic). He just whined and complained and oh my gosh if the world wasn’t falling down on top of him.

Looking back, he also carried the same attitude when we were on our Disney cruise. Feeling like he deserved to get a new toy every time we walked by the shops, or that he deserved to make his own choice and decisions as to when and what he could do on the ship. Now this whole scenario I didn’t fully put on him alone. As his parents, Will and I consciously knew both boys were tired, over-stimulated, and not eating the best, most well-rounded meals, so of course there was some expected mis-behaving, but it was bad. I remember at one point thinking (and I will pre-apologize for saying this because overall our boys are very respectful, thoughtful, kind children – especially when not with us, but I’m being honest here), “Wow, we have the brattiest boy ever!”

Going even further back, before the cruise, and somewhere during the end of summer, I remember first noticing this mindset of entitlement in Zackery. I can’t recall what triggered it, if anything, but I remember beginning to consider taking him to a homeless shelter or somewhere where he could see firsthand that there are people in this world, right in our own backyard, that are suffering and don’t have all the “stuff” we have. Several times I have tried to talk to him about all the things we should be grateful for (the shoes on our feet, food in our bellies, a warm bed to sleep in every night). He seems to get it in that moment, but it doesn’t stick. I feel like if he experiences what I’m trying to teach him it might actually start to change his mindset.

I don’t want to scare him or threaten his sense of security within our loving home, but I need him to learn gratitude.

What about you? Have you struggled with entitlement with your own children? How do you handle it? I would love any feedback or suggestions here – this is new territory for me.

In my own gratitude, L&MH.